
On the stage is a table with a brightly colored box on it. On the floor in front of the table is a shape on the floor with a blanket draped over it, covering whatever is underneath. Enter ROUND RONNY a very large, brooding man dressed up in some sort of sparkly, colorful costume, reminicent of RAINBOW RANDY from DEATH TO SMOOCHY. RONNY walks to the center of the stage as the opening tune of a children's show plays.
RONNY: Hello boys and girls! Welcome back to Fun Land, I hope your all ready to have a golly good darn time today!!!!!
(5-8 actors should be placed within the audience to acts as the audience motivators.)
MOTIVATORS: Yeah! Round Ronny we love you! Lets have a good time! Yay! Yeah! Yay!
RONNY: Hey kids, we're going to play a game! You like games don't ya kids?
MOTIVATORS: Ya! GAMES! Ya! Yes! Sweet a game! Yay!
RONNY: But like with all games, this game has a rule... This game's rule is that every time I ask you a question I want you to answer with YES! In Fun Land we ALWAYS answer YES because no one gets told NO in Fun Land!!!! And there is something else children...
MOTIVTORS: Shh! Shhh! He said there's something else. Quiet! Listen! You listen! Shhhh!
RONNY: This game has.... A PRIZE!!!! (RONNY pulls a handful of candy out of his pocket.) CANDY!!!!! (RONNY throws some candy into the crowd.)
MOTIVATORS: Sweet! Candy! Aww I want some! I love candy!
RONNY: Let's practise ok kids?
MOTIVATORS: YES!
RONNY: hahaha catching on already! Very good kids! Very good! (Ronny reaches into the brightly colored box on the table and pulls three apples.) Now kids... would you like to see me try and juggle theses apples?
MOTIVATORS: YES!
RONNY: Very good, very good. (He throws handfuls of candy to the audience.) Now for the juggling... (He attempts to juggle but fails and the apples fall. The motivators in the audience laugh wildly like children would.) Aw are you guys laughing at me?
MOTIVATOTS: YESS! Hahahaha! Aha ha ha! Heheha ha ha ha!
RONNY: Did you think that was funny?
MOTIVATORS: YES!!! (RONNY throws handful after handful of candy into the audience. RONNY reaches into the box again and pulls out a skateboard.)
RONNY: Would you like to see me try and ride this kids?
MOTIVATORS: YES!!!!
RONNY: GOOD! (He throws candy into the audience and then tries to get on the board. He falls and the motivators break into hysterical laughter again.) Did you think that was funny kids?
MOTIVATORS: YES!!!
RONNY: Hahaha! Good! (He throws more candy.) Would you like to see what is underneath this blanket kids?
MOTIVATORS: YES!!! YESS!!!! (Hopefully by now members of the actual audience have joined into the “game.” Ronny lifts up the blanket in one quick snatch and revealed to be laying underneath is a young woman. Badly beaten and tied and gagged.)
RONNY: Do you know what a “bad girl” is children?
MOTIVATORS: Yes. Ya. Yes.
RONNY: Well, this woman is a “bad girl” a very, “naughty girl.” And she deserves to be punished doesn't she children? (RONNY is different. He paces around the girl in a circle, he looks down at her with a frightening snarl on his face, like a pitbull ready to cause damage.)
MOTIVATORS: YES! (RONNY picks up the woman roughly by one arm. She is weak and cannot stand on her own. She is dirty and beaten and wearing harldy nothing. RONNY holds her up for one moment and then lets her fall roughly to the ground. The motivators laugh like they did when RONNY dropped the apples.)
RONNY: Haha did you find that funny kids?
MOTIVATORS: YES!!!
RONNY: Very good, very good! (He throws candy from his pockets garder and harder) Would you like to see something even funnier kids?
MOTIVATORS: YESS! (The answers from the motivators should become more and more agitated, more and more savage. Think group mentality and mob attitude. Ronny pics up the woman and goes to let her sit in a chair and then at the last moment takes the chair out from under her, letting her fall to the floor. Once again the motivators roar with laughter.)
RONNY: Yes, yes thats so funny isn't it children?
MOTIVATORS: YES!!! Hahahah! YES!!!
RONNY: Yes it's so very funny! Hahahaha! How about this? Is this funny? (RONNY kicks the woman as hard as he can while she's on the floor.)
MOTIVATORS: YES!!! Hahahaha! (The responses from the motivators should be bordering on savage)
RONNY: YA? And what about this kids? Isn't this so very funny? (RONNY climbs ontop of the woman and rips her top open. He hits her several times in the face.)
MOTIVATORS: YES!!! Haaa! YESS! (Ronny pulls candy out of his pockets and thows it into the air and at the audience.) Yess! Yes! Yesss!
RONNY: YESS!!! YES! YES! This is so funny isn't it? (He wraps his hands around her throat and begins to choke the life out of her. She struggles and he keeps strangling) I should keep going shouldn't I children?
MOTIVATORS: Yes!
RONNY: She deserves this right kids?
MOTIVATORS: Yes!
RONNY: YES! YES
MOTIVATORS: YES! YES!
The motivators and RONNY continue to scream YES lound and savagly until the woman stops struggling. Clearly dead.
RONNY: Well kids, thats the end of our show for today, but remember I LOVE YOU!
RONNY walks off stage as the children's show closing tune plays. Blackout and the motivators leave the audience humming the tune.
Wow. That was intense. I really liked it. I'm a little astounded that you wrote that, but I always knew I liked you.
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